Are you currently stuck in a vicious cycle (or for my German readers, ‘Teufelskreis’ – which literally means a ‘devil’s circle’) of wanting to let go of the past and move on to the next chapter of your life?

Hello, I’m Ellie, and I am exactly in that position right now… so you’re not alone 👋

If you’re new here, you won’t have heard that I have recently accepted a new job in the digital marketing space, but this one has a longggg commute of 3.5 hours each way. The plus side is that it is only once a week in the office. However, I know that after a couple weeks or months of doing this journey, I’ll be tired of it. So, I’m making plans to move out or move on. Word play is going to be huge in this post for sure.

This isn’t a recent thought process – no, not at all. I left university last year at the end of second year of studying (and I’ve just been awared a DipHE for this so yay for me!), and since then I’ve had a couple of jobs, which both have taught me invaluable life and professional experience (duh, it’s a job). But these jobs have been no more than thirty miles away from my parents home in the Midlands. Now I believe I am ready to… move on from this life.

This new job has opened my eyes to new horizons. Why would I want to be stuck in the past when I could be moving on? Get out and explore the world. Step into adulthood fully, not just on a “part-time” basis. Do you feel like this, you early-twenties Gen-Zers or recent graduates out there? Although it “makes sense” for me to stay at home and sponge of my parents a little while I save to move out in the future, I want to hit fast-forward.

At university I severely struggled with the idea of being alone, and so I was home most weekends, or with my then-boyfriend. Living with nine other people meant I was never really alone, but my mental state back then sure felt like I was. And I know I’m not (mentally) where I want to be – there’s still a lot of shadow work to be done – but I am totally ready to step out there and show the world, my parents, and most importantly myself, what I’m made of.

At home, I’m coddled (my own choice, I know) and I definitely choose to step into the stereotype and ideology of being the “youngest child” – even if it’s just by 12 minutes (I’m a twin)! And I can be childish at times, fulfilling this role amongst my siblings. In the workplace, though, I am highly professional, and love this side of me. I’m independent, ambitious and full of drive, dreams and possibilities. So why wouldn’t I want to take this leap??

---

My point with all this is that we have to sometimes wait until we are ready to move on, with anything in life. Jobs, relationships, friendships, even mental situations. Sometimes people can force things onto us that we are totally not ready for, like I was with university and living “alone”.

We have to wait until we are ready. That is so important. Ok, from time to time we’re not going to have the luxury of doing so, especially in the workplace. However, a lot of the time, it’s ultimately our choice – and we always have a choice. Please remember that.

My decision and desire to move out is not an impulsive one, and I’m not quite there yet. For instance, I haven’t even started this new job yet! I am getting myself ready to move on from this chapter, and maybe you should too. Step outside of your comfort zone and experience things bigger than just what’s on the horizon in front of you. Dream big and never let anyone, especially you, sabotage these aspirations.