A blog by Pepetoe.

It’s a question we don’t often stop to ask ourselves: do I see myself as a leader, or a follower? From school to work to our personal lives, we’re constantly navigating spaces where these roles show up. Sometimes we take charge, guiding others with confidence. Other times, we find comfort in following, in letting someone else set the direction. Neither role is “better” than the other. Both are valuable, both are necessary. But understanding where you naturally lean can teach you a lot about how you show up in the world, and even how you want to grow.

For me, this question has shifted depending on where I’ve been in life. At times, I’ve naturally stepped into leadership: in work, in recovery, even in small moments where I’ve had to guide myself through challenges. But I’ve also had chapters of my life where following felt safer, where I’ve looked to others for direction because I wasn’t ready to trust my own voice. Neither phase makes me more or less “enough.” If anything, both have shaped me into someone who’s learning to balance when to lead and when to lean.

The Value of Leadership

Leadership isn’t just about managing a team or being the loudest voice in the room. True leadership is about responsibility, influence, and setting an example. It’s choosing to step forward when something matters to you, even if it feels uncomfortable. For me, leading has often looked less like “taking charge” and more like being willing to speak up about recovery, to create space for conversations that others might be too afraid to start. Leadership is as much about courage as it is about guidance.

The Power of Following

There’s also something deeply powerful about being a follower. It doesn’t mean being passive or weak, as you may have been taught. It means being willing to listen, to learn, and to let someone else’s vision inspire you. In recovery, I had to follow the advice of professionals and the encouragement of loved ones before I could find my own strength again. Following allowed me to grow in ways I couldn’t have if I’d tried to do it all on my own. Sometimes the bravest thing is to surrender, trust, and let yourself be led by others.

Finding Your Balance

I’ve learned that life isn’t about choosing one role over the other. It’s about recognising when to lean into leadership and when to embrace following. Balance looks different for everyone: maybe you lead in your career but follow in your friendships, or maybe you follow at work but lead in your personal growth. The key is to understand that both roles have value, and that switching between them doesn’t mean you’re inconsistent. It means you’re adaptable. Being both a follower and a leader is totally ok.

Redefining What It Means For You

So, are you a leader or a follower? Maybe the real answer is: you’re both. And maybe that’s exactly how it should be. Instead of boxing ourselves into one identity, we can give ourselves permission to take on each role when it serves us, when it helps us grow, or when it helps others. Leadership and following are not opposites – they’re partners. Together, they teach us how to show up authentically in the spaces that matter most.