Have you ever had one of those days where something just feels off, but when someone asks what’s wrong, you have no idea how to answer?

Maybe there’s this quiet ache you can’t name.
Maybe you feel irritated or anxious for no obvious reason.
Maybe you want to cry, or scream, or curl up under the duvet – but nothing “bad” has actually happened.

It’s easy to brush these feelings off. To think, If I can’t explain it, it must not be real.
But that’s not true. The truth is: your feelings are valid, even when you don’t have the words for them.

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We Weren’t Taught How to Feel

Most of us weren’t raised with an emotional vocabulary. We were told to “calm down,” to “stop being dramatic,” to “just get on with it.” Emotions were either too big, too inconvenient, or too messy. And so we learned to tune out from them.

Especially if you’ve been through trauma, struggled with mental health, or grown up people-pleasing, it’s common to feel disconnected from your inner world. You might feel numb. Blank. Foggy. Or like your mind is buzzing and your body is heavy, but you can’t explain why.

And then you feel guilty for not being able to explain it.

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Just Because You Can’t Define It Doesn’t Mean It’s Not There

We’ve been conditioned to believe that we need a reason to feel how we feel. That our emotions have to make logical sense. That we’re only allowed to rest, cry, or ask for help if something “bad enough” has happened.

But emotions don’t follow logic. You don’t need a bullet-pointed explanation for your sadness. You don’t need a written diagnosis to feel overwhelmed. You don’t have to justify your mental health to anyone – not even yourself.

Unspoken, unlabelled feelings still matter. They still affect how you move through your day, your relationships, your work, your healing.

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Here’s What You Can Do Instead

So, what do you do when you don’t know how to put what you’re feeling into words?

You soften into it. You get curious. You stop trying to make it “make sense”, and just let it be there.

• Name what you can notice. Does your chest feel tight? Is your jaw clenched? Is your mind racing or slow?
• Use imagery. Instead of “sad” or “anxious,” try “it feels like a heavy fog in my stomach,” or “like there’s static in my head.”
• Say the honest thing. Like, “I don’t know what this is, but I know I don’t feel okay.”
• Let that be enough. Not knowing doesn’t mean you’re making it up. It means you’re human.

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You Don’t Need to Earn Rest, Love or Support

You don’t need the right words to deserve care.

Your mental health doesn’t need to be at rock bottom to be worthy of attention. You don’t need to explain your breakdown, your burnout, your sensitivity, your softness. You just need to listen to yourself and honour what you find.

This Mental Health Awareness Week, and always, let this be your reminder:
You don’t need a diagnosis, a reason, or a crisis to matter.
You are allowed to not know.
You are allowed to feel weird, emotional, lost, or tired – and you are still enough.

Even when you can’t explain it. Especially then.