Christmas & Eating Disorders

TRIGGER WARNING: EATING DISORDERS

Last year I uploaded a post with the same title. This year I am covering this important topic again, from a different angle.

I have been in recovery for 18 months now, as opposed to 6 months last year when I first wrote about this. For that reason, I believe that this post will share more insightful advice and knowledge about how to cope with Christmas time when you are in ED recovery.

The first thing you need to remember is that you are not alone. A human condition is that we often think we are going through something very unique, and that no one else has ever struggled with it. Let me tell you, there is a 99% chance that someone has. BEAT UK estimates that 1.25 million people in the UK have an eating disorder. For those girls and women aged 11-34:

0.3% have or had Anorexia (29,267)
1% have or had Bulimia (97,557)

Although these percentages aren’t that big, look at the numbers attached to them. In this society, the numbers are only going to increase.

The months leading up to Christmas, and Christmas itself, can be a struggle for those in recovery. There is a tremendous focus on food during this time, which can be triggering. At any time of the year, food is one of the main topics we talk about in the Western Culture (among the weather, celebrities and politics!). Therefore, it’s almost impossible to get away from.

What advice would I give?

Let your family and friends know that you are struggling: this can seem like a scary thing, but as soon as you have that support system in place, the scariness does seep away. Especially on Christmas Day, have a chat with your parents about it, and prepare them if you have a breakdown at the dinner table.
This is something that I didn’t really do, and it caused some upset at the table a couple years running. Now I know that if I just tell them that I’m feeling a little off, everyone feels a lot calmer and understanding of the situation.
Remember that this is only one day in the whole year: enjoy the food! If you have just started recovery and you are presented with a large 3-course meal, there is no doubt that you’ll be feeling scared and overwhelmed. It is daunting. But, remember that it is Christmas Day – it’s all about food, family and creating memories together. It’s one of the only days in the whole year that we get to see everyone get together around the dinner table and have a good time.
Take a deep breath: before you eat, remember why you are in recovery. You want to get better, don’t you? This may be your first big challenge in recovery, so think of it as a positive that you’re challenging yourself!
You won’t gain weight overnight: this is something that I still struggle with today (yes, 18 months in!). Eating a huge meal is always going to be scary for me, but remember that you’re body isn’t going to change after eating one more chocolate than usual. Even after a week of Christmas food, your body will not change. Please remember this when you sit down at the table and panic about gaining ‘X’ amount of weight.
Switch your focus: turn your gaze to the fact that Christmas is about spending time with your family. Yes, it involves food (delicious food!), but it primarily focuses on the connection that we have with our loved ones.
Food connects us, it inspires us and most importantly it keeps us alive: change your mindset into a positive one. Nourish your body, mind and soul with yummy treats and heart-warming meals over Christmas and Winter. As soon as you do this, recovery will seem a little easier.

Accepting that we all eat a little more over the Christmas holidays is easier said than done. Sometimes we lose control and over-indulge – but doesn’t everyone? This is the time to eat those treats and spend time with your family, not punishing your body.

Guilt will creep in during this time, but remember what I have said above (and many times before in various posts). Food is a wonderful thing and we should not punish our body or overcompensate for the extra food we have eaten. Enjoy it!

Before I sign off, I want to tell you something else. Last Christmas, when I uploaded that post, I struggled more than I thought I would. After the meal, when my grandparents and aunts and uncles left, I broke down. I said to my parents that I was so mad at myself for feeling guilty, because I hadn’t had an episode like that in a couple of months. I was really angry at myself, I thought I was on a good path in recovery. However, my parents reassured me that recovery isn’t linear, and perhaps Christmas will always be a trigger for me.

It’s about coping with the thoughts and voices in your head. You will never completely be rid of them. Every day is a battle, but you will get there, I promise.