Thursday 15 Sept

Have you ever fallen out of love with something that used to bring you so much joy? Perhaps it was a childhood sport, a food you used to enjoy, an album you used to play on repeat. When the realisation comes, it can feel so devastating, like your world is crashing down around you. Well, don’t worry, this happens to most of us.

For me, hockey was a burning passion of mine from the age of 8 to 16. Then the pandemic came which meant I couldn’t play it for a year or so. Perhaps that was the turning point for me – the universe telling me that the sport was no longer serving me.

At university, I tried to get back into it. When I found myself not enjoying it anymore, and instead getting anxious and upset when ever I thought about it, I felt so lost and sad. I had fallen out of love with something I had done for most of my life, a sport which carried me through high school, my outlet for emotion and anger, like my passion for dance also.

Hockey was an entire chapter of my story, but that’s all it was. Now there is room for the next chapter, the rest of my story.

You are going to fall in and out of love with things for the rest of your life. It just happens, and we have to accept that. We grow out things that used to serve us and bring us a heart full of passion and ardour. One day, the spark slowly starts to burn out. It’s one of the most melancholic, saddening feelings in your life when you realise this.

However, as I said, it happens.

This is the case for a lot of childhood passions. We fall out love with these hobbies when we grow up. We mature and move into the next stage of our life.

In a way it’s kind of exciting when you fall out of something which once made up so much of you and your personality. It’s time to find a new passion, a new dream, something else to get lost in.

Each lesson we learn, each passion we fall out of touch with, is a vital stepping stone in our journey to finding out who we truly are and what we truly enjoy doing. It is up to you to pursue what makes you happy. If something no longer makes you happy (or in fact makes you feel quite the opposite), it is no longer serving you, as sad as that may be.

It’s time to start to understand yourself better, to reconnect with yourself, to start again and start a new chapter. By letting go and accepting this, you are permitting yourself to be filled with renewed energy and passion for something new.

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Have you ever felt like this? It’s a strange and heart-wrenching feeling, but it is also exciting. It’s time to start a new chapter in our life. I kind of like how this has fallen in line with the new season and new year at university, where I can find new things I enjoy and fall into the next season of my life.

Here’s to my life version 2.0.

Pepetoe Love ❤